Batman and Robin CONFLICTS!
by The Plutomite
Summary: Alright, I realize that this has nothing to do with Teen Titans, but I didn't know which one to put it under in all the Batman choices. Sorry, I'm not that huge of a fan of Batman... HOWEVER! This story is funny! And it does have some foul language...


**AN: Okay, first thing I have to say BEFORE YOU START READING STORY! Now that I have your attention, I have to tell you that this is just a funny story that my sister and I had made up while at our great grandparents. See, they were all taking their midday naps, and we were in the kitchen when suddenly, we started role paly about Superman and this plummer, and then I went to Robin, thinking of the Teen Titans, however, we starting using Batman too, so yeah...**

**Well, we completely said it all out, and then, I told her that I wanted to put that on , and so we attempted to write it out..which we did obviously, and now it's up here. Back to the point, this is just a funny story and it's not supposed to be insulting or anything, just a funny story. **

**ENJOY! [Please?]**

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Batman & Robin (Conflicts)

[Robin calling Karen]

Robin: Karen! Karen! Where's the bat mobile?

Karen: Why do you want to know!

Robin: Because Batman ditched me again.

Karen: Well…I don't know what's in it for me?

Robin: I'll give you a raise?

Karen: How much?

Robin: $200

Karen: An hour.

Robin: No, a day.

Karen: Hour!

Robin: Day!

Karen: Hour!

Robin: Day! C'mon thank about it, you could just be there and not work and $200 dollars.

Karen: Uh…..No I'll pass *click*

[Karen hangs up on Robin]

[Batman paging Karen]

Batman: Karen, if Robin calls tell him he is a fag.

Karen: He just called saying you ditched him….again?

Batman: Uh…yeah…I saw a chick.

Karen: Alright, I'll tell Robin. *sighs heavily* again.

[Hangs up]

[Robin calling Karen]

Karen: Hello?

Robin: It's very rude to hang up on people.

Karen: Whatever. Batman called he said that you are a fag.

Robin: Yeah, well he is being a douche!

Karen: That not my problem! But…if I had that raise...

Robin: -.-, Karen I said no.

Karen: Fine...why did you want it anyways?

Robin: I wanted to spray paint his car.

Karen: Why?

Robin: Never mind that Karen, do you know where it is?

Karen: He has it.

Robin: AND HE DOESN'T COME AND PICK ME UP!

Karen: * holding phone from ear* owo

Robin: if you only did what you were told and get a hold of Batman or have him come pick me up!

Karen: *hangs up*

[Batman sign flashes big and the theme song 'Dunununun']

[Batman pages Karen]

Batman: *while chuckling* Hey, Karen. Put all three of us You, Robin, and I on three way *chuckles more* but don't tell him that I'm there.

Karen: *sighs, and mumbles* not again.

[Karen paging Robin]

Robin: Hello?

Karen: So…what color were you gonna spray paint his car?

Robin: Something nasty like pink.

Karen: Why?

Robin: I don't know, he hates the color.

Batman: YOU ARE A FAG! *hangs up*

Robin: THAT JERK FACE!

Karen: Why don't you just call him, and sort this out?

Robin:….I don't know.

Karen: *rolls eyes* oh my god Robin, goodbye! *hangs up*

[Robin calling Batman]

Batman: Hello?

Robin: Batman…I really think we should work this out.

Batman: *sighs heavily* Alright fine, what do you want to know about you being a fag?

Robin: Alright! That is it Batman! Guess what! Guess-what!

Batman: What Robin, what are you going to do about your fagness?

Robin: I just traced your call! BITCH! *hangs up*

Batman: *sighs* shit.

[Batman symbol]

[At Alyssa's house]

Alyssa: I love you Batman.

Batman: I love you too [ hears car starting]

Alyssa: What was that?

Batman: Damnit Robin! *goes outside house see Robin starting to speed down road*

Robin: *screams outside window* Suck it Batman!

Batman: Get back here now!

Robin: *Leaning completely outside window* NO! Batman you brought this upon yourself! * Because leaning completely out window, Robin crashes into a light post, airbag goes off. Batman stares bewildered, and shakes his head while sighing, and looking down then hear motorcycle and sees that Robin has turned the bat mobile into the batcycle*

Batman: *mumble* Dumbass *goes inside, sighs" I have to go.

Alyssa: But I thought you loved me.

Batman: What? Ew, no.

Alyssa: But, But, But *starts to undress self*

Batman: Oh god please I will pay you to keep that on.

Alyssa: *looks as if about to cry*

Batman: Don't play that shit with me, you and me both know you are fugly as hell.

Alyssa: But, I got a nose job, and boob job just for you.

Batman: Bad Idea. *Walks out door*

[Bat symbol]

[Back at masion with Robin and Butler]

Butler: Good morning, mate.

Robin: Did you always have that accent?

Butler: No I just bought if online…mate.

Robin: Uh..sure *begins to go upstairs*

Butler: Do you like it…mate…I think?

Robin: No, I don't at all I think you should get rid of it right now.

Butler: Ok *talks normally*

Robin: *countinues to go up stairs*

[In Robins room]

Robin: *calls butler*

Butler: Yes.

Robin: Hey, do you wanna hang out?

Butler: And do what?

Robin: I don't know play video games.

Butler: what kind of games?

Robin: Non-violent.

Butler: What about Grand Theft Auto?

Robin: Sure *speaks with excitement*

[In bat cave with Karen and Batman]

Karen: Why do you guys give each other shit?

Batman: Its fun to see Robin pissed off.

Karen: *-.-*

Batman: Oh my god! I just had an idea! *Picks up Karen and throws her against the wall

Violently* Karen quick fix the bat mobile* Picks up a wrench and chucks it at Karen's

Head* you'll need that to fix the bat mobile, oh and this* Pick up heavy metal object,

And throws it as Karen's skull*Flashlight.

Batman: *walks over to Karen's limp body* Karen, C'mon hurry up! We go to go. * he

Bends down and begins to poke her bloody for head* C'mon I'll give you a raise.

Karen: *jolts up immediately* Ok I'm up, let's talk about raise.

Batman: *grabs computer off desk, and drops it on her back* I don't know why I just

Did that.

Karen: *gets up rubbing her head* And this is why I need a raise.

Batman: What raise? I said nothing about a raise.

Karen: C'mon I don't get paid enough!

Batman: Oh, yeah you do, you get $75 a**week!**

Karen: -.- *drops down on the ground as if passed out*

Batman: I'm gonna fire this chick.

Karen: I'm up.

[Robins Room]

Butler: *killing someone on game* I could totally kill someone in real life right now.

Robin: *stares wide-eyes at Butler and then slowly gets up, and edges towards door*

Running away once outdoor*

Butler: Oh, well at least I can go do my thing with the picture I saw on the endtable.

[Bat symbol]

Batman: *comes and get ready to know on Robins door, then hears moaning inside.

While opening the door Batman says* Robin are you doing what I think you're doing?

We talked about this you promised only on Saturdays and Wednesdays.

Butler: *stare wide-eyed at Batman* I can explain.

Batman: No, I don't want to know *long pause* who is on the photo?

Butler: *stares directly at Batman, Batman idotictly stares back*

Batman: It's okay if it was Robin, we were all gay once. I even saw Robin being gay once…I did…and it felt nice too.

Butler: Yeah…sure it was Robin.

Batman: Well, if you see him, tell him I'm looking for him. *Butler nods and closes door in Batman's face. Then Batman starts to hear moaning again.*

[Bat symbol]

[Robin and Batman meet up in hallway]

Batman: Robin, I have this amazing idea, but before I can tell you, please, explain to me why the Butler is in your room jacking off.

Robin: *O.O* I would rather ot talk about it.

Batman: Oh…okay? Now for my amazing idea. We are going to rob a back.

Robin: …how?

Batman: Karen made us invisibility cloaks a long time ago…

Robin: Normally, I would advise you not to, sorta like all your other idiotic schemes. However, I believe this will be AWESOME!

Batman: Sweet! Lets go!

[Batman symbol]

Batman: *sings to 'Smack That' by Akon ft. Eminem* Smack that all on the floor, smack that, give me some more!

Robin: That's not how you sing it. It goes like this: *in higher pitched voice* Smack that, all on the floor, smack that, give me some more, smack that, till you get sore! Smack that! Ohhh!

Batman: Wait! Robin! My batty senses are tingling!

Robin: Dude, that's Spiderman! *Spiderman jumps on windshield, Robin turned towards the windshield and stares in awe as Spiderman shakes his head back and forth making a low grunting noise. Spiderman then jumps off windshield.*

Robin: , Spiderman! Spiderman! Here comes Peter on the clotheslines, but his name is not Peter, its Spiderman! Spiderman!

Batman: *turns his head quickly* You've seen that episode too! *violently turns car into a U-turn* Lets go watch Family Guy!

[Batman symbol]

[Batman and Robin outside Robins room]

Robin: *steps up to door* Dude I can hear groaning!

Batman: *Mumbles* Still?

Robin: I'm going in there. *Kicks open door and rushes in*

Butler: Don't come over here.

Robin: Dude! You're on MY bed!

Butler: Dude, don't come over here. *Robin comes over, looks and picture, wide-eyed*

Robin: That picture is a picture of dunununununununu…BATMAN! *Batman comes in a the sound of his name*

Batman: Dude! That's my picture!

Butler: I-

Batman: NO! NO!

Butler: But, but-

Batman: YOU'RE FUCKING FIRED! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE!

Robin: Yeah, no vacuuming my room on a daily basis and what not.

Batman: *turns to Robin dramatically* Now lets go watch Family Guy, Robin.

* * *

**AN: Sooooo? Whaddya think? Funny? My sister came up with the second to last Batman line...it had ALOT more cussing in it O.O Well, I thought that it was funny. Please, review!**


End file.
